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Chapter 16 / Part Three / From Baby to Toddler

Potty Training

Timing, methods, stool refusal, and nighttime dryness.

On this page

Core idea: Children eventually learn to use the toilet through many different methods. Starting earlier can reduce total time in diapers but often lengthens the training process; evidence does not identify one universally superior method.

One-Minute Recap#

  • Toilet-training age has risen over time, largely because families start later.
  • Earlier starts are associated with earlier completion on average, but training often takes longer.
  • Starting intensive training before roughly 27 months has not been shown to produce earlier completion.
  • Evidence comparing child-led, scheduled, intensive, reward-based, and other methods is sparse.
  • Family consistency and child readiness likely matter more than the brand name of a method.
  • Stool toileting refusal is common and can become a constipation-pain-refusal cycle.
  • Nighttime dryness is a separate biological skill and often develops years after daytime toilet use.
  • Elimination communication can work for families willing to organize around it, but strong comparative evidence is absent.

Guidance at a Glance#

Label Takeaway
OPTION - Moderate Start earlier for fewer diaper months or later for a potentially shorter training period; neither choice predicts broader development.
SKIP - Moderate Skip promises of guaranteed three-day training or one method that works for every child.
RECOMMENDED - Moderate Use a clear, calm, consistent approach across caregivers.
MUST - High Address painful stool, withholding, blood, persistent constipation, or other medical concerns with the pediatrician.
RECOMMENDED - Moderate Treat nighttime dryness separately and avoid shame or punishment for bedwetting.
OPTION - Low Elimination communication is a lifestyle choice with limited evidence, not a developmental requirement.

Readiness and Method Worksheet#

Child Signals#

  • Can reach and sit safely on the potty/toilet setup.
  • Has some awareness of wetness, stool, or the need to go.
  • Can follow a simple routine and communicate in some way.
  • Shows interest or tolerates practice without extreme distress.

Family Readiness#

  • Caregivers and childcare can use the same basic plan.
  • Several relatively stable days are available for an intensive approach, if chosen.
  • Clothing, potty access, cleanup, and outings have been considered.
  • Adults can remain neutral about accidents.

Problem Cheat Sheet#

Situation Response
No progress after an early start Reduce pressure, reassess readiness, or pause and retry later
Urine success but refusal to poop Prevent constipation; allow a low-conflict bridge such as a pull-up in the bathroom while working gradually toward the toilet
Fear after painful stool Treat the constipation/pain with clinical guidance before escalating training
Dry by day but wet at night Use nighttime protection without shame; this is a different skill
Caregivers use conflicting rules Agree on prompts, rewards, accident response, and language

Numbers Worth Remembering#

  • The chapter finds no benefit from beginning intensive training before about 27 months.
  • Stool toileting refusal occurs in roughly one quarter of children during training in cited studies.
  • About 80% to 85% of children are dry at night by age five.
  • Clinicians generally become more concerned about persistent nighttime wetting around age six, depending on history and symptoms.

What Is Still Uncertain#

  • Which method works best for which temperament and family.
  • How effective specific solutions for stool refusal are.
  • Whether elimination communication provides benefits beyond earlier toileting for families who prefer it.

My Family Notes#

  • Child and family readiness signals:
  • Method and language all caregivers will use:
  • Reward/response plan:
  • Constipation prevention and call threshold:
  • Nighttime plan:
  • Pause/reassessment date: